same vote, different feeling

four years ago at this moment i was euphoric and realizing that i was witnessing history.  don't get me wrong, it's pretty exciting, and an enormous privilege, to participate in something as important as voting for those who will lead you, but today had a different feeling.  

maybe it was relief?  relief that it's finally over.  relief that i finally made my voice heard - officially.  relief to know that, regardless of political persuasion, i will still have my friends in the morning.  but ... but, there's something more ... or less.  

maybe it was ordinary?  it seemed more like an exercise today.  maybe it's because i'm trying to protect myself?  i admit that's it difficult to listen for months and months about how i might be less of a person - because i'm gay, because i'm a woman, because i work in an agency that some believe is an unnecessary waste of taxpayer money. 

but then, i felt energized by the fight.  i want to fight for who i am and what i value.  my vote was my knockout punch.

think i might be back

i can't believe that i haven't even been on this blog since july 2011. don't have anything to say right now. just wanted to let you know that i'm back.